


A Mother's Love

by flipflop_diva



Category: Divergent Series - Veronica Roth
Genre: Collection: Purimgifts Day 1, Family, Gen, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-23
Updated: 2016-03-23
Packaged: 2018-05-28 04:48:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6315544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flipflop_diva/pseuds/flipflop_diva
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>The baby in her arms is wiggling, her tiny hands already reaching up to grasp at the empty air, her gray blue eyes already open wide, darting around, as though she is trying to take in anything and everything she can as fast as she can. She can’t see very much yet. She is, after all, only a few hours old, but Natalie can’t help feeling like the little girl in her arms is already more aware than anyone thinks.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Mother's Love

**Author's Note:**

  * For [scribblemyname](https://archiveofourown.org/users/scribblemyname/gifts).



> Happy Purim! I hope you enjoy!

The baby in her arms is wiggling, her tiny hands already reaching up to grasp at the empty air, her gray blue eyes already open wide, darting around, as though she is trying to take in anything and everything she can as fast as she can. She can’t see very much yet. She is, after all, only a few hours old, but Natalie can’t help feeling like the little girl in her arms is already more aware than anyone thinks, already deciphering this world she has been born into.

Natalie looks down at the baby, runs a finger over the curve of her tiny nose, touches her soft little lips, traces down the silkiness of the skin on her neck and her arm and then rests her finger in the baby’s hand. Almost instantly, little fingers make a fist around it, and Natalie feels a warmness grow in her chest and spread throughout her whole body. She wants to sit like this forever, hold the baby close to her chest, dote on her, then whisper in her ear all the things she wishes she could tell her about her life and her legacy and what the world is really like. Not just outside of this room, or outside of this medical ward, or outside of their district. But outside of Chicago, outside of the fence.

But she can’t. She can’t because it’s not safe. She can’t because the truth is her own secret to hide and hold on to forever. And here she is an Abnegation. Here, parents don’t spend hours coddling their newborn children. From the day they are born, they must learn to appreciate acts of selflessness and service that go beyond themselves. Here, she can’t give any indication that she is not what she appears to be by doing otherwise with her own children.

Natalie has already spent more time than she should have these last few months, during nights where the kick of a baby’s foot against her stomach has kept her awake, wondering what it would have been like had she never come here. Or if she had told Andrew the truth long ago, back before they had ever chosen Abnegation; if she had whispered the truth in secret and then taken him away from here.

They could raise their family out there, in the world, in a place where people are more than an experiment and life is more than an enclosed environment.

But no. Her duty is not just to this child, or to her other child, or to her husband. Her duty is to protect everyone, to protect these people. It is more than the Abnegation in her that knows it is only selfishness that would protect her own family and leave others to die.

She will never do that. She signed up for this mission and she wants to see it through, _has_ to see it through. But she can’t deny that holding her flesh and blood in her arms makes her almost want to reconsider.

Growing up, Natalie never expected to be a mother. She never expected to be anything really. Getting through each day was an accomplishment in itself. Surviving her mother, surviving her past, surviving the fringe. Even when she moved into the Bureau and met David, thoughts of a future — of a husband, a son, a daughter — were never something she dwelled on or even pondered much.

But here, now, holding this baby, looking down at her, Natalie feels like this is where she was always meant to be.

The baby in her arms is still wiggling, kicking her little legs and waving her little arms, but for a moment, it’s almost like she feels her mother’s stare. The gray blue eyes find Natalie’s eyes and seem to peer straight into them. 

Natalie takes a breath, a deep sharp breath. She doesn’t know how — although maybe she has always known; it has always been a very good possibility — but she suddenly is aware — _knows_ without any doubt — that this child is different than any other child she has ever met. Different, too, than her older brother.

She’d had a feeling since she found out she was pregnant that the baby would be Divergent, but this baby. She is more than just Divergent.

And for a quick moment, Natalie is terrified at what that could mean. At what dangers could await her child if the wrong person finds out.

But then she takes another breath, lets the panic flow out of her body, reminds herself that if she is meant to be here, this child is too.

She lifts her head at that thought, looks away from her daughter to glance around the room, but no one is there, no one is watching. She bends her head over her child once more, kisses the baby tenderly on the crown of her head.

“You are meant to do great things, little one,” she whispers so softly no one could hear her, even if they were standing beside her. “That I know. And as your mother, I promise I will always protect you. Always.”

The baby in her arms coos, almost like she understands. Natalie straightens back up. In the distance, she can hear the sound of footsteps and a child’s eager whisper. 

Andrew and Caleb, coming to meet the newest member of the family.

Natalie shifts the little girl in her arms, waits for her husband and son. She doesn’t know what awaits Beatrice in the future, but she doesn’t need to. Not yet. She knows that whatever happens, she will be there to protect her. And for now, that is enough.

**Author's Note:**

> 


End file.
